Tuesday, April 26, 2011

sunshine is fine

some guy in a bakery gave me advice:

WRITE! everyday
READ! the good, and especially the bad
SCHOOL CAN'T TEACH YOU ANYTHING! except boring, technical things


thought i'd pass that along. even to you non-writers. here is a little recap of my beautiful life lately:

-go to work! where i eat cookies and do all the dirty work
-go to internship! where i do all the dirty work and learn about hip hop
-go to Adam's house! where we do not sleep and laugh/jam/feast on fruit/walk Biscuit/watch VCR's/lay together and absorb it all
-occasionally visit my house

i am thriving. damn, it's good to be a gangster.

doubtless

i keep
         falling
                    more in love with you.
                                                     not
                                                      a
                                                     downward
                                                      tumble, more like

                                                                                        falling up.

a place where it seems we can get no higher,
and then
                                                                                        we do.



Friday, April 15, 2011


open your damn ears and give this a listen

my first piece of satire (which is pretty funny if i do say so myself)


A Utah Teacher's Guide To Sexual Education

      1. SEX IS BAD- As far as your students should be concerned, the only things that come from sex are babies and diseases.
      2. SEX IS SCARY- And questions about sex are scarier. If a student asks anything, refer them to their parents immediately.
      3. CONDOMS PREVENT MINIVANS- But this is Utah, and we love our minivans. Mentioning this and any other form of contraceptive may result in termination of your career.
      4. SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE DOES NOT EXIST- It is your job to blur religious beliefs into scientific fact as quietly and effectively as possible.
      5. IGNORANCE IS BLISS- Hard facts and/or information about sex, STD's and pregnancy will only overwhelm your students. It is best to provide them with adequate blinders to anything except abstinence.
      6. SEX IS NOT NATURAL!- Teenagers may be running rampant with hormones, but sexual urges are the highest form of evil and must be suppressed immediately. No sex is the best sex.
      7. WORST CASE SCENARIO- If a student tells you they have had sex and ask for advice, they are lying. See #4.


i am really fucking happy. i can't wipe this shit-full-of-glee-grin off of my face. and folks, i wish the same for you.